Posts Tagged ‘compassion’

Yoga is WEIRD.

Tuesday, November 16th, 2010

So often I say to myself and to others – I wish I could call yoga something different. Relieve “yoga” of all its stereotyped afflictions and shift the perspective of those who are resistant to it – show them the practice that changed my life – for the better.

When I first began doing yoga, I thought it was all weird. I did not chant, I often left during savasana because it felt torturous having to just…LAY there. My mind chattering monkey that I could not quiet. I did not connect with the language or the stereotyped lifestyle. I did not want to “sparkle out my fingertips” and cringed and the smell of nag champa – ok, ok…I still do.

This is not a post about how I changed my mind or was drawn in when I realized all the amazing benefits of yoga – which are more than I can name (I hope it would be obvious!).
This is about yoga and its ability to open up the acceptance of self as we *already are*. Eventually, I knew that I could get into my flow alongside any Lulu-clad muscle man or patchouli princess and still feel like I was right where I belonged. That the only thing separating me from the other human beings I took class with was….ME.

Over the course of time, tears and near-criminally honest self-evaluation; it was all too clear. We are all a little weird. Whether we do yoga or not, the important lesson lies in our ability to stop judging others and ourselves. To find clarity in the present moment and feel peace with what already is. Yoga is just one way to get there.

So, instead of trying to change yoga to make it more palatable for the masses of folks who feel more comfortable judging it than doing it – I have decided to accept that it may not be for everyone. But the fact is, there is a practice that everyone can do and feel better for it. JUST BREATHE.

After all, that’s all it really is.

If we are able to breathe – a whole world of possibility opens up for us. The opportunity to shift, change or accept becomes all the more available. The breath is our bridge between the body and the mind. So if you can breathe – you can do yoga. In fact, you already are.

How weird is that?

In love,
Elle

United States of Self

Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010

So the wife and I have been watching a whole whack of  the TV show United States of Tara. Ever the evolving (and occasionally neurotic) yogi – I was drawn to what Tara experiences on a few different levels. Tara is several characters played by Toni Colette. From a (still-unknown) childhood trauma, Tara experiences a very colorful (read: Hollywood) version of  MPD (multiple personality disorder). She essentially keeps her daily reality manageable by her mind creating versions of ‘Tara’ who can cope with whatever comes up. Thus, Tara herself never has to “deal”. This of course has an innumerable amount of side effects – but hell, what disorder doesn’t?

From a yogic perspective, this makes complete sense. Multiple personality disorder is a manifestation of the incredible machine that is the body/mind. Our WHOLE-istic self and its management of trauma is truly amazing. We all “cope” every single day – whether or not we create other people in our heads to navigate the waters of our daily life is completely irrelevant. We all have our disordered “functioning”.

Coping in this sense translates to avoidance. As beings, we are terminally human. We naturally avoid pain and seek pleasure. This behavior ultimately creates our suffering. Just as Tara strives to maintain her sanity in a relatively audacious way – we avoid the things that “make us crazy”. We numb out, drink ourselves stupid, over-eat, blank out at the TV (ironic much?), become workaholics, sexually compensate, and basically do anything we can to AVOID FEELING whatever it is that our hearts know that we really need to “deal with”. We attempt, in our ignorance, to create bliss. Which only lasts for so long. A temporary band-aid on what ails us. The more we seek externally, the worse the pain becomes. Its like having a case of permanent chicken pox. The more we itch, the more we scratch. The more we itch…

Despite the fact that I would rather save you the pop culture reference, we must look at the popular culture to see the vein we share. We all have our baggage. But instead of supporting each other and giving space to the emotions that are clearly festering as a nation: we offer commercials filled with pills to pop, chemicals to wipe away, sweep away and cover up whatever stinks about our human condition. Reinforcing our need to seek external ways of fixing what is truly internal.

Yoga is our way of moving inside. Yoga and its intrinsic ability to reconnect all of our “selves” by yoking the body with the mind. Making us acutely aware of our habits and patterns that seek to move towards material and external fixes instead of looking deep into the root of what is causing us to search in the first place. We learn to sit with our pox-like condition and wait for the itch to pass – suddenly noticing that the mind will give us something new to focus on if we just have the patience to listen to the doctors orders and wait it out.

Then we can see that we are truly whole already. That everything we need lies within and is already there just waiting to be discovered.

Jewel in the Lily

Friday, June 4th, 2010

Yesterday I was bustling over to my home studio Yoga for the People, bunches of lilies in hand. We had an event that night and wanted people to have a beautiful organic scent for the night’s practice.

I chose to walk the alley to our back entrance, which for those of you who know it, is in Gastown. The east side of Vancouver has long been home to many people struggling with addiction, mental illness and have challenges that many of us do not face daily or ever. Some people may have avoided this entrance but, the worst I have encountered personally is embarrassing someone while they are caught relieving their bladder on the local graffiti. But I digress…

As I walked into the alley, I met a woman who was sauntering along sniffing a carnation. She weaved back and forth and was quietly talking to herself.
Then she stopped in front of me, became quiet and eyed my large bunch of flowers.
She looked at her carnation, then looked back at me.

In that moment, I knew that I had two options: I could shut down and rush past her to the door and inside. Safe and sound – knowing that my fear of an unknown reaction/encounter would be propelling me. Based on what I have been told/read/heard, it would be a “wise” and “safe” choice.

OR I could open up and invite in whatever the experience brought me. Face any fear that tinged my re-action to my situation. Recognize her as another human being and drop my judgments.

So I opened up.

The woman approached me and with a delightfully half-toothed grin exclaimed “Wow those are absolutely gorgeous! What kind of flowers are these?” with the same amount of enthusiasm that one could expect from a child full of joy.

My heart burst.

Here I stood, my life is full, heart is full, my arms literally are filled with flowers…and this woman who may or may not have more than the carnation she carried, was so deeply present, so kind and only had beautiful things to say. I was amazed.

This woman was living and breathing yoga.

So we exchanged more details about the flowers and while we said pleasant goodbyes, I realized she had not asked for anything of me – but had given so much.

Each moment, each breath, each opportunity presented can be coloured by our fear or our love. We can drop our inclinations, expectations, and stand tall in the unknown. This is to be comfortable with uncertainty.

No matter where we are, no matter what we encounter, we always have a choice. We can either open up or shut down.

For the time being, I choose to breathe and be open in the face the places that scare me. While I do not advocate that folks go running around alleys trying to face their fears…I definitely invite you to check in with your typical re-actions and shift gears. More often than not – you might be delightfully surprised by the results.

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the naked eye.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Shaken Awake

Wednesday, May 12th, 2010

Perhaps you have been there…

Its the time when something so devastating happens that you feel as if someone just pulled the anesthesia plug from your own open-heart surgery.

Suddenly you are wide-awake with pain, lights held over you and your heart feels, well…broken open. You didn’t sign a release form, no one told you that anything was wrong with your heart in the first place and BAM! here you are. Doused in pain and dazed with confusion.

Then something wild happens…

There is a sweet fire in your chest. A  bright clarity shines with such intensity that you don’t know whether you are in pain or seeing clearly for the first time. All of your priorities align immediately and everything else drops away.

This is awakening through adversity.

Then we have a choice: we either open up and embrace the moment, or we shut down and block the experience.

We rarely have much choice over what occurs in our lives but we ultimately have complete control over how we re-act to circumstance. Can we slow down, take a few deep breaths and bring compassion to ourselves and other before acting? Or do we allow ourselves to be caught up in the pain and blinded to the possibility of a greater lesson?

This is the practice.

What arises during our yoga is preparation for the “big stuff”. On our mats, we create tiny microcosms of our lives. We find ourselves either embracing or enduring asanas.

The reactions to small things like holding DownDog for an extended period of time can tell us many things about your level of patience. Our standing poses are telltale of how balanced we currently feel in our hearts. How compassionate can we be towards ourselves when holding long yin postures?

Everything translates. It is up to us to decipher the code.

So when the awakening knocks like thunder on our hearts – we can be ready. Take a few deep breaths and soften into whatever it is we need to face and embrace.

Knowing that nothing is permanent. This too shall pass.

With love and gratitude,

Elle